I lived in secret shame for years and I refuse to go back. From finding out at the age of 16 that the girl I was madly in love with was 6 months pregnant. After almost ruining the wonderful relationship between my Mom and I for even dating girls. To then walking across the stage pregnant leaving my 4yr scholarship to Texas A & M behind to raise my son barely even knowing how to raise myself. My life continued to unfold from there with more not so good choices. I based friendships and built relationships off of this hidden shame and embarrassment that I had. So I tried to cover it. I moved out at 18. I kept a decent job. I tried to attend college. I even tried to make a relationship work over and over again because he was willing to cover me and my son and take up the responsibility of fatherhood since my sons Dad never came around. He wasn't ready for that kind of responsibility. It wasn't that I cared what people thought I just didn't know how to recover so I created my own path. Without a vision the people perish.Proverbs 29:18 I never got a chance to just let the pain all out cause I was too busy trying to keep it all together. I didn't want to be just another number to society. Things came crashing down eventually and I learned a lot of lessons the hard way. For a long time I tried to live as if it didn't affect me but inside I was slowly dying. BUT GOD has intervened and my heart smiles today. I was trying to fix it on my own but only Gods grace is sufficient enough to take care of my shame. His grace has freed me and I no longer have to live from and make decisions from my shame. You can choose to destroy your shame too.
Maybe your secret shame doesn't come from the same mistakes and choices I made but shame is shame. Maybe for you it's a permanent STD, being over weight, high school drop out, hidden abortion, insecurities, financial hardship, rape, felony or misdemeanor, or whatever. The list could go on and on. You've centered your life around this hidden shame. You feel doomed and trapped for disaster like I did so you compromise. You stay in dead end relationships and create unhealthy friendships. You gossip and talk about others to avoid your own issues. You no longer dream for better days. You just going through the motions. Its time to let it go. You don't have to start telling people about it get a journal instead. Write it ALL out on paper. Cry about it and just let those feelings be released. Then rip and burn it. Pray. Repent. Forgive. Ask God to remove the spirit of shame from your life in Jesus name and fill that void with Gods love, joy, and peace. Start a new journal. Write out your dreams. Make a vision board. Today is your day to stop compromising and start living! It's time to stop making choices using that old news. It can be OVER now. You've accepted the good news into your life. You belong to the Most High God. You are a daughter or son of a King! Believe and receive your inheritance! If you haven't accepted Jesus Christ into your it's not too late. Accept Christ into your life here
It doesn't matter what you've done or what happened to you. Jesus has already paid the price for it. Be born again so can live.
Instead of your shame you will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace you will rejoice in your inheritance. Isaiah 61:7